This Family Reunification Month, we’re highlighting the families who have reunified or stayed together after challenges or hardships. Thank you to Tialynn Barker for sharing your family’s powerful story via a written testimonial.
“My name is Tialynn Barker, and I’m a proud mother of five beautiful children (all under the age of six) and my husband’s name is Trevor Barker. My family’s journey hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been filled with transformation and healing. We’ve walked through some very difficult seasons, including separation, life’s trials, and in the end, genuine reunification. I’m sharing our story today in hopes that it brings encouragement to someone else going through a similar situation. What we’ve learned is that no matter how broken things may feel, restoration is always possible when love, support and faith are at the center.
My husband and I both had difficult childhoods. Trevor was pulled back and forth by parents who struggled with addiction, while I dealt with multiple types of abuse and family members dying. Once my stepfather passed away at 14, I tried to drown out all the pain with anything I could. Trevor landed himself in custody multiple times due to his lack of true direction. We met in addiction, but then kids came into the picture. We talked about change, but didn’t know how to achieve it. It’s been an uphill battle. Trevor had to fight his legal past and it took two DFS cases, multiple programs, opening our eyes to the lord, and lots of meetings. We were so lost, stuck, and we weren’t taught what a healthy family even looked like. Parenting classes, faith and finance classes, anything you can get into to understand the truth most broken families don’t comprehend will help. One things for sure, it’s not weak to speak up and ask for help. It’s hard in the beginning, but lay a firm foundation with as much support and community you can grasp and when the boat rocks, it won’t sink.
“It’s not weak to speak up and ask for help. It’s hard in the beginning, but lay a firm foundation with as much support and community you can grasp and when the boat rocks, it won’t sink.”
– Tialynn Barker
Having to cut off all the bad influences, leaving the bad environments behind, and starting anew, especially in Christ, was scary and intimidating. Yet once I stepped into all the blessings with a constant mind of gratitude, it completely shifted my world. I can feel happiness and not be afraid of it all crumbling down. You have to believe in yourself, in God’s provision, and in those around you. My husband started his own business as a painter, Barker Custom Painting, and I stay home with our children. I feel as if I can finally breathe.
As a family, we really enjoy spending quality time together – especially outdoors. Whether we’re swimming, painting, watching funny videos or just soaking up the sunshine, we love to laugh and create memories. One of our biggest passions is learning more about God and growing in our faith together. We’re actively involved in our church community and Celebrate Recovery, which has been a huge part of our healing. We also find joy in giving back through programs like His House Foundation and Victory House – places that once supported us and now allow us to pour into others walking similar paths. At the heart of it all, our values are rooted in faith, connection and growth. We truly believe that without Jesus, we wouldn’t have been able to rebuild our lives and step into the people we were always created to be.
As soon as school starts, I’ll just have Alix at home (she’s one year old), but then I’ll have three kindergarteners and a first grader. Johnathyn, who’s 5 in July, and our twin girls Tyler and Tegan will all be together in the same class even though they’re 10 months apart. Everyone will think they’re triplets. Matthew, who is 6, got best in math and reading when he graduated kindergarten this year. Putting your children in counseling, doing play therapy with them, and any individual one-on-one time you can give them to reassure them, help them heal, and build them back up after all the chaos is crucial.
Some people will get mad at the state for stepping in, but both times in our experience it helped us to realign ourselves and we learned so much throughout the process. Yes, it is hard, but in the end you’ll see. Our teams, our church, and our communities… as long as you connect with the right people, you’ll find support, empathy, and hopefully you won’t even look back. There’s a future waiting for you and your family outside the trauma, homelessness and broken lives. You just have to fully surrender and keep an open mind for it to truly work.”
